FOR A GOOD LONG TIME, I TRIED TO UNDERSTAND AND APPRECIATE SPORTS. SPORTS OF ANY KIND. BUT I FINALLY GAVE UP ON EVEN PRETENDING TO CARE. THAT'S FINE, BUT EVERY NOW AND AGAIN, I WONDER WHAT PEOPLE GET SO EXCITED ABOUT. ESPECIALLY WHEN I'M ON AN AIRPLANE AND I WATCH A MAN READ A SPORTS SECTION. IT'S LIKE MAYBE HOW AN ILLITERATE PERSON GETS WHEN THEY HEAR TWO PEOPLE DISCUSSING THE LATEST JOHN GRISHAM NOVEL.